Scientist predicts Germany v Scotland result – using deadly E. coli bacteria

A GERMAN scientist believes he has predicted the outcome of the opening match of Euro2024 – by using deadly E. coli.

Microbiologist Markus Egert reckons the bacteria grown he’s grown in a Petri dish have come up with the correct scoreline for Germany vs Scotland.

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Markus said: “We have managed to grow relatively few germs on a Petri dish with a culture medium, so that the distribution of the colonies that these germs form can then be used to predict a soccer result.

“We interpret this as follows – the more colonies grow in a team’s penalty area, the more goals against them will be scored.

“And so we try to use the distribution of microbes on the Petri dish to predict how the game will end.”

The bad news is that Markus’s microorganisms reckon it will be a home win next Friday.

He says: “This is the prediction of the opening match between Germany and Scotland. And you can see a relatively clear victory for the German team here.

“We have a lot more colonies in the Scottish 18-yard box than in the German one. And that already suggests that the Germans will score more goals than the Scots.

“So we predict a clear victory for the German team in the opening game.”

Meanwhile, Clarke kicked off his preparations for Euro 2024 with a 2-0 win over Gibraltar in Faro.

For the most part, it was a disappointing night in Algarve and not even two clinical strikes from Ryan Christie and Che Adams could disguise the fact that we’ve lost our mojo in front of goal at the worst possible time.

The former Kilmarnock boss will need to take flight to Germany without striker Lyndon Dykes after the QPR star had to be stretchered out of training with a leg issue last week.

It now leaves Clarke with just Lawrence Shankland and Adams as his only out-and-out strikers.

But he will likely call upon another player to take his place – and he revealed last night that Tommy Conway is on his mind following his latest goal for the Under-21s team.

He said: “It was nice that Tommy scored. He is a good boy, Tommy, and he is certainly in my mind. Can we replace Lyndon like for like? No. Would it have been a better performance with Lyndon in the team?

“Probably no, because they dealt very, very well with high balls into the box. They defended the box really well. We just need to find a little bit more craft from certain players on the pitch to unpick that type of defence.”

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